It's easy to find yourself once you've found yourself
Or it sounds easy when people talk about it, like Louisa Young explaining why an afternoon of real communication with Johnny Cash helped her find who she really wants to be. But if you don't know, and you don't know if what you do is what you want to do or just what you do well, where would you start? You never know what your overmastering passion is until it's overmastered you, as Harriet says in Gaudy Night: writing or religion or marriage or teaching. It's like trying to explain a movement that's become a reflex - you lose the steps you went through to learn it and it's hard to remember the feel of the movement before it was part of you.